This past 6 weeks as we wait for our clearance from the US government and also wait for our court date - I like to tell myself that I am fine, which for the first month(maybe) I was pretty good. These last 2 weeks however, I do all that I can not to cry at the thought of my son. I don't do a very good job of holding back the tears most days.
My heart hurts, but I know that many have and are going through this process and have had to endure SO much more than we are. I think of the mama who got their referral over a year ago and still do not have a court date due to orphonage closures. I think of the mama who was told last week that she was going to get a court date, and then didn't. I think of the mama who went to court last July for her sweet little baby, only to wait another 6 months to bring their almost toddler boy home.
I am blessed to have an amazing family and beautiful children by my side. I have not done a good job of living in the blessings that I am in the midst of - I want so badly to be THERE but I am HERE - and I have to be thankful for that! I have to embrace my children, that are here, and love them, and appreciate them, and not take this time with them for granted - wishing away the time until we get to meet our son!
I saw this video on a friends facebook post today and it is so very close to my heart! I pray that God would empty my heart and my life of MY desires, to fill me back up with HIS. I pray that God would enable me to praise Him, even amidst the wait and the unknown! No matter what - I will PRAISE YOU, LORD!
(Don't forget to scroll to the bottom and stop the music to watch the video!)