THREE YEARS - Our family will NEVER be the Same!

It started out as a typical Sunday morning - THREE years ago today!.  We went to church - prayed and praised God for the family and gifts He had given us!  Started lunch in our kitchen and Josh rocked our world with the question....."What do you think about adopting a little sister!?"  If you know anything about our story then you know that God led us on an emotional and stretching few years to bring not a sister into our home but TWO brothers.  If you don't know our story - I encourage you to go back to the BEGINNING of our blog and read up....to God be the glory!

God started us out on our journey - that started with kicking and screaming and hesitancy and quickly turned into having our eyes open to a whole new level of God's love and compassion.  He worked in and through us - He taught us to lean on Him and follow His leading for our family.  Well - TWO years ago today we looked into the eyes of a sweet little boy that God allowed to be our son!  I reread my post from that day and it brought tears to my eyes - - read about it HERE!  God had it all planned out - down to every little detail...including his name - - read about it HERE!

God was not done with us yet and has taught us SO MUCH MORE over the last TWO YEARS!  About love and grace and patience and mercy and grief!  Here is the video that we made to introduce Nahome to the world all those many months ago.....pay CLOSE ATTENTION to the last picture in the frame.....a boy who seemed to be on the sidelines but like I said - God was NOT done with us yet - - read about it HERE!

Today - THREE YEARS from starting this journey - TWO YEARS from seeing his sly little smile we have a healthy, giggly, bouncy young man who brings SO much joy to our lives!

I cannot imagine our family without him.....

Or Him....
to God be the glory!

DO SOMETHING

I heard this song on my way to church - - I'm ready to DO SOMETHING!  How about you???

I woke up this morning 

Saw a world full of trouble now 

Thought, how’d we ever get so far down 

How’s it ever gonna turn around 

So I turned my eyes to Heaven 

I thought, “God, why don’t You do something?”

Well, I just couldn’t bear the thought of 

People living in poverty 

Children sold into slavery 

The thought disgusted me 

So, I shook my fist at Heaven 

Said, “God, why don’t You do something?” 

He said, “I did, I created you” 

If not us, then who 

If not me and you 

Right now, it’s time for us to do something 

If not now, then when 

Will we see an end 

To all this pain 

It’s not enough to do nothing 

It’s time for us to do something 

I’m so tired of talking 

About how we are God’s hands and feet 

But it’s easier to say than to be 

Live like angels of apathy who tell ourselves 

It’s alright, “somebody else will do something” 

Well, I don’t know about you 

But I’m sick and tired of life with no desire 

I don’t want a flame, I want a fire 

I wanna be the one who stands up and says, 

“I’m gonna do something” 

We are the salt of the earth 

We are a city on a hill 

But we’re never gonna change the world 

By standing still 

No we won’t stand still 

No we won’t stand still 

No we won’t stand still

Awakening

I have been meaning to write for a while but just wasn't sure what to say.  My blog has always been a place of therapy and healing for my soul.  A place to pour my heart out and share my fears and joys.  It is not only about me though, I want my posts to make a difference.  I want those reading them to be moved and feel as if my words were thought out and heartfelt.  I have been busy being Mom to 5 kids but to be honest - over the last many months I didn't really feel like I had much to offer in a blog post.  My words were muddled and my heart wasn't feeling much to share.  I am beginning to see why and I want to share with you what I am learning.

Have you ever been run through the ringer emotionally??  Not just the highs and not just the lows - but this crazy cycle of both!?  I will try to paint a picture for you.  For 2 years we poured our heart and soul into our adoption journey - an adoption journey mind you that we didn't even know we were destined for.  Over those 2 years we dealt with fear, stress, joy, courage, trembling, shock, elation, confusion, frustration, weariness, heartache, compassion, awakening, anger, bitterness, feelings of being overwhelmed, heartbroken, filled to the brim, eye-opening, feelings of being insane, tired, crazy, joyful, thankful, grateful.  You could pick any combination of these feelings and often I would feel them on any given day.  I have had some of my highest of high moments and lowest of low moments over these last couple of years!  Adoption is an EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER - it is NOT for the weak at heart.  We learned more about God's grace, mercy, strength, love, compassion.  He opened our eyes to what He wanted us to see - and I'm telling you it was not always pretty.  It was often heart wrenching and humbling.  I have never felt closer to God than over these 2 years - I poured my heart out to Him for direction and guidance for protection and comfort for my children (His children).  These emotions came to a climax as the boys came home - then we spent the next many months over the last year and a half helping our boys process those some crazy emotions listed above - grief and anger, confusion and sadness, happiness and joy, experiencing firsts and the fears that come with it, reminiscing and remembering, yearning and weariness.

After 3 years of high EMOTIONS I have realized that I was on emotional overdrive for so long that somewhere along the journey it turned into survival mode.  I was truly doing little more than surviving - at times I felt as if I was even failing at that.  My emotions were spent and spread thin - I felt washed up and dried out.  I felt as if I had lost my passion and fire - like there wasn't enough strength left in my heart to feel passionate about anything while still clinging on for survival.

I woke up one morning over the last month or so and realized that my heart yearns to feel again.  Survival mode is not good enough any longer.  God has been speaking in that still small voice kind of way - stirring my heart.  It feels like a fog is lifting and God is awakening something in me.  I want to have a direction and purpose - to feel like I am making a difference in the world around me.  I want to cling to God and seek his guidance in my life.  I want to feel passionate for what God is doing in and through me!  I know that it may not always be easy and that it may not always be comfortable but I'm ready for God to grow me and use me and show me more of His heart!

In church today we sang Life Song and the second verse hit close to home and I could feel God continuing to awaken my soul!

Lord I give my life
A living sacrifice
To reach a world in need
To be Your hands and feet

So may the words I say
And the things I do
Make my lifesong sing
Bring a smile to You

I am ready to stop merely surviving and start living again!  Who is with me??  

Stay tuned to the blog - I think God has BIG plans for us as He continues to Awaken our hearts!

Christmas Giving with a Purpose

Christmas looks a little different for us this year - to be honest it has looked a little different for the last few years!  We never went out of control and overboard - but we were content in our materialism and were awfully close to being consumed with presents and stuff and all the hub-bub of keeping up with the Jones'.  A few years ago - as we walked through our adoption story - God opened our hearts and eyes to SO very much!  He showed us that there are SO many important things to be done in the world and that it can start right here - in our family.  We want to teach our children to focus on others and that Christmas is about LOVE.  That God LOVED us enough - when we didn't earn it or deserve it - HE became flesh and dwelt among us!  Christmas is about GIVING - God GAVE His only SON that we might LIVE!  It isn't about Santa and Stockings and Presents.  All of these are fun and exciting things and still bring joy to our family - but our focus and our purpose is to GIVE LOVE!

Teaching to Give with Love Can Start Close to Home - - For the last few years our kids have gotten to shop for each other for Christmas.  They love to pick things out for each other and they also love the one on one time with Mom or Dad that comes along with the shopping part of it.  On Christmas morning the kids are so much more invested in watching what everyone else gets because they can't wait to see them open the present from them.  When our family was smaller - they got to shop for both of their siblings.....now that our family is bigger - we draw names between the kids!  They have truly enjoyed the joy of giving and the surprise and anticipation of the season.

Teaching to Give with Love Can Reach the WORLD - - This year we are implementing a new way of giving.  On top of getting to spend a certain amount on each other, the kids get to spend the same amount gifting to someone in need.  We gave them a whole bunch of ideas of how they wanted to spend their money but in the end they got to choose how to give it.  I LOVED the conversation that circulated through the kids.  I heard things like...."It is so hard to choose - I want to help them all!"  "Which one do you think is the most important, mom??"  "I want to help as many people as I can - which one will help me do that?"  "I want to give Bibles, because without Jesus they would have nothing!"  "I want to give chickens because I want another little boy to be able to eat eggs too!!!(Any guesses on who that was!?)".....I was BLOWN away by the depth of love that the kids were showing.  They took it very seriously and had awesome reasons for the choices that they ended up choosing.  We also teamed up with our parents and my brother's family to make a difference in the world this Christmas!

Here is how our family is choosing to Give Love this Christmas:
~ We are providing 1500 meals for needy people in Burundi!
~ We are providing Bibles and Song Books to Kids!
~ We are providing 3 families with baby chicks!
~ We are providing a little girl with a Musical Lamb that sings Jesus Loves Me!
~ We are helping sponsor a missions team to travel and spread the Good News!
~ We are providing 5 chickens to families in need so they can have eggs to eat!
~ We are sponsoring a teacher in Haiti!
~ We are providing 650 vaccinations for children in rural villages!

Here are the organizations that helped us give love this year!
~ Child Care Ministries http://www.childcareministries.org/
~ Mission Aviation Fellowship https://maf.org/donate/giving-catalog/2013/all#.UqNxD_RDsuc
~ Samaritan's Purse http://www.samaritanspurse.org/gift-catalog/give/
* There are SO many great organizations out there - - these are just a few that we used!

Our family is learning to love through giving!  I hope you take time this Christmas season to think about what Christmas is all about and how you can make a difference this Christmas!

Precious Memories

I have been thinking a lot lately about this time of year - the leaves falling and the weather getting colder.  I have been reflecting on how different our lives looked this time last year - just barely having brought our boys home.  There were lots of precious times - and lots of hard times!  Looking back it is hard to believe how far we have come - with growing, and grieving, and becoming family!!  I am in awe how God orchestrated it all!

 I think my most favorite thing about this time of year - for this year - are the memories that the boys have!  I hear them say "Remember last year...." and "Oh yeah - I remember...." and "When we do that this year...."  I LOVE that they have a memory to draw from with holidays coming up and all the hustle and bustle that it brings.  To those outside of the adoption community - holidays are a nightmare for transitioning kiddos.  They truly do need structure and routine and calm and people and things around them that they are comfortable with and used to!  You take the holidays - on the go, out of routine, over-stimulating, with people and things around them that they are not used to.  They stress easily over things that they are unsure of....the holidays are a big mystery to kiddos from a different culture.  We had lots of meltdowns, shutdowns, tears, and stress over the holidays last year!

This year - the kids are looking forward to what is to come with hopeful anticipation!  They have a reference point in their memory of what to expect - sweet precious memories that help them feel connected.  We still deal with issues of the hustle and bustle and the over-stimulating behaviors that can come.....but OH MY - - we are SO much better off this year!

I LOVE my 'not so little family' and all that God has and is doing in and through us!  I am so proud of my children and the young people they are growing into!  I am excited to share this holiday season with kids excited about life, thankful for what they have, and grateful for the baby in the manger!  Can't wait for more PRECIOUS MEMORIES to be made this year!

Twins NO more!

With International adoption, a child's age is usually a little fuzzy.  With Ethiopia in general, birthdays are a little vague.  We know several families who realized once they got home that their children were actually older or younger than their paperwork stated.  With older child adoption you have to teach your children how old they are and when their birthday is - the birthday that someone at a desk picked for them at random.

When we got the boys home we had pretty good evidence that Isaiah's birth date was fairly accurate.  It became pretty apparent in those first few months, however, that Nahome's was not.  We had some pretty solid evidence pointing at a much younger age than his paperwork said.  Documentation that is hard to deny, when put up against some person sitting at a desk taking a shoot in the dark as to how old and when his birthday should be.  So we decided to see if we could use this evidence to move his birth date to a more appropriate age for him - developmentally, physically, maturity - it just made sense.

So - I'm writing to tell you that we received signed documentation from the judge that Nahome's new birth date has been approved.  The evidence led us to July and we chose the 7th day of the month - we liked that his birth date would be 7-7....God's number!  The kicker is that this change makes him five once again - instead of almost 7!  When we talked with Nahome about it he was a little confused....but once we told him he got to have FUN summer birthdays and he is the only kid probably anywhere that gets to have TWO six-year old birthday parties he was all smiles and giggles!!

So - we no longer have TWINS in the family - just a brother and sister who have grown so very close over the last year!  I am thankful for them and the joy they find in the little things of life!

Happy GOTCHA DAY - Bizuayehu ISAIAH!!

It seems like just yesterday that we fell in love with Isaiah in Ethiopia, but this last week we hit our ONE YEAR HOME mark!!!  A year ago I wrote THIS!  I was giddy with anticipation for our unexpected blessing to finally make it home and for our family to be together - on the same continent!  Josh traveled to Ethiopia alone and picked up Isaiah one year ago.  This year, on his gotcha day, Josh and Isaiah were spending some time together up hunting!  It has been a year full of blessings as Isaiah has joined our family and everyone has gotten used to the new normal!  I cannot believe how far we have come and cannot imagine my life without Isaiah in our family!  He seemed so quiet and timid when we first met him...

He quickly became part of the family!

He started his new adventure on his first airplane ride!

Isaiah has grown so much this year!  He is 3 1/2 inches taller and 16 pounds heavier than the scrawny little boy that walked into our lives a year ago!  His English is amazing and he has made HUGE gains in school!  We are so blessed by him and his heart for others!  We have had a lot of fun this last year....here are some pics to show the joy that he brings to our lives!

He made lifelong friends so very quickly!

He had a blast learning and participating in sports for the first time!

We spent a lot of time outdoors this summer!

Blessed beyond measure to be the family that God led us to be!!!